Romeo juliat on Messenger

If you are sitting by your Messenger waiting for a Juliat, romeo or Prince Charming to pop up, you might hit the jackpot any moment. But hitting the jackpot is not the end. It is the beginning of what may be and mostly is a bumpy ride.

The Internet revolution has been around for more then a decade. In the past decade 2.5 million American lovers tied the knot after meeting online. Such unions became a part of the Western culture and economy (dating sites made big bucks).
According to the Wall Street Online Journal many of these marriages are going downhill now. The first decade was of excitement, the second one is of consequences.

This article is to examine why internet romance can be frustrating. This category of romance includes lovers who met in the chat room or the dating sites.

Online shopping is attractive because a lot of products of different brands, packages and prices are made easily obtainable. The same is true of Internet dating. A wide variety of individuals of different origins, countries, statuses and interests are available in the brush of a second. The key factor that makes it thrilling is that we imagine more than we observe.

“It’s only words and words are all I have to take your heart away.”-Boy Zone
The person you come across introduces himself or his profile does it for him. Either you believe him or else get going. Take it or leave it.

He narrates who he is and you present yourself to the best of your abilities, and in the process facts are a little warped. (We are not talking about the bizarre incidents where people pretend to be of the opposite gender or different ethnicity.) What we are talking about is hiding bankruptcy, obesity or pretending to be a university professor or living in Manhattan. Consciously or unconsciously, we project ourselves like we would like to be in reality. Living our fantasies is easier online.

Let’s be more sensitive here. There are things in everyone’s life he/she has yet to deal with!

Like the acne marks or job loss, hatred for alcohol or fondness for booze, it’s easy to hide anything and everything online. And obviously we don’t want our online sweetie to know what we perceive to be our own shortcomings or weaknesses.
The extent to which people lie or hide surely differs but it never fades away. Both the parties “nudge the truth” and when the affair goes offline, cracks in the stories become visible.

Also, people try to find a mate in their surroundings first. Internet is usually the last resort and desperation is therefore high.

Since the online profile is the ultimate bait, pages and pages are filled with few facts and plenty of fibs.

Some even seek professional help in filling and judging an online profile. No wonder online spouses commonly accuse each other of lying before marriage to win cases in courts.

Promise anyone anything and get away with it, no consequences online. Given that the major part of the relation evolves through text messages-the tones, mood and verbal cues are absent, increasing the chances of misjudgment. Even if voice chat and web cams become involved, meeting the person online and in reality is still poles apart.

There is one more issue. We see what we want to see. We notice and get attracted to certain characteristics in a person that we consider important. You might get too swept away by what appeals to you and not pay attention to what you, your living standards and circumstances require you to look for in a partner.

Mesmerized by his/her choice of music, discussions on Thackeray, supremacy in chess, and the oh-so pretty photograph that was mailed last week? And of course, the fact that he works out in gym two hours a day and she is unsatisfied with her pedicure this week are viable cues to his/her health and status. These can be misleading.

This information is not enough to decide to spend the rest of your life with him or her.

Plus, the web is a free place for all ages to find love. A 16 year old also wants a relationship too. But is he/she ready for it? Teenagers are not only too young to decide whom to spend their life with, they are also more prone to fall in the wrong hands and get exploited. The love life and its crash landing can have negative affects on their careers and personalities, which have yet to bloom.

For the past few million years attraction has had a different story. Men look for fertile women to spread their seed and women look not only for fertile but also competitive males who will not only impregnate them but also help in bringing up the offspring. Fertility and competitiveness are visible in appearance. The broad jaw line and well built physique in men not only promise healthy genes, but also fine hunting abilities (competitiveness). In modern day, the perfect catch is the one with lot of sex appeal and a high status. Finding the right partner was crucial to our survival and these cues are completely absent online.

Research also suggests that our likeness depends on similar interests, attitudes, beliefs and attractiveness. Opposites might attract (the chances of which are high on the Internet), but in the long run only similitude can assure smooth sailing.
Can we defy, within a decade of the Internet revolution, what we have acquired in millions of years?

In real life, the main factors that get people to hook up include physical proximity. The more you see a person, the more familiar and thus more admirable he/she becomes. If the guy is sitting in Nigeria and the girl in Thailand, dating is a genuine problem. Imagine how frustrating it is to not being able to have enough of your darling.

Physical proximity also has additional benefits. If the lovers share a neighborhood, high school or even a book club, they have access to each others past life, families, friends etc. Above all there are mutual acquaintances. The fractures in the stories mentioned above will have more chances of being leaked out, before it’s too late.

People who meet in real life also end up in bad relationships, but with a higher tendency of online lovers to lie, deceive and misjudge, the chances of break-up are also higher! Another thing that is frustrating is that playing games in the virtual world is easier than in reality. A person can appear visible; become invisible or never sign- in again. It’s very excruciating to have a sweetheart that vanished in thin air for eternity.

Keeping away from online love (if you can help it) will save you a lot of hassle. It’s difficult to talk people out of love, but it’s good to warn them of the impending disaster.

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Healthy minds, Happy living…………..

 

Healthy minds, Happy living
sarwat ansari

There is a saying: “ The best thing you can give to your enemy is forgiveness; to an opponent tolerance; to a friend your heart; to your child a good example; and to yourself respect “

In fact these are the best things we can do for ourselves; forgiveness , tolerance, intimacy with friends, good example for children, and self respect. These are essential ingredients for a happy, healthy life with high standards of morality, spirituality and satisfaction.

Forgiveness to Enemy is extremely difficult, but possible. It can be surprisingly beneficial for one’s physical and mental health. Research has shown that people who forgive experience more energy, better appetite and better sleep patterns. Forgiveness is for you and not for anyone else. And Remember that a life well lived is your best revenge.

Tolerance is a sign of strength. Tolerance makes you empathize with your opponents, helps you analyze each situation with honesty and clarity. To get the facts tolerance is essential. Control on emotions helps us analyze difficult situations calmly and can disarm your enemies.

Intimacy with friends serves as a cushion against stresses of life . It is absolutely necessary to have some one close by to share your inner feelings. So share your intimacies with friends and listen to them. Never take a friendship for granted, make friendship a top priority. Find time to be with friends. Open up to friends. Maintain a deep friendship relationship at the level of “psychological intimacy.” Don`t be afraid to express your inner fears & feelings. It prevents you from stress and disappointment Help your friends with their problems, as well. Sincere and timely help reaffirms the bond of friendship. When your friends are shaken, stand by them in good and bad times to win their loyalty and sincerity.

To give your child a good example and to have an impact on child’s life, it is important that you take the right path for yourself and stay on course. Whatever qualities you want to see in your child, you must acquire them for yourself. As Mahatma Gandhi said: “We must be the change we want to see in the world”. Children can follow your example.

Self-respect makes your life easier and happier. Always remind yourself of your and strengths and capabilities. Never try to compete with others, whether in accomplishments, appearance, or possessions. Jealousy is a self-inflicted pain and can be disastrous. Be satisfied with what you have. Those who cannot accept what they can not control — are most likely to suffer and live unsatisfied lives.

Syed Mohammad Masoom Abidi

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Islam Simplified

salat

Dear friends whose minds are closed and prejudiced against Islam,

I have notice lots of people seem to have totally blocked minds, which are closed and prejudiced against Islam. Maybe because most media is not truly international and represents only the views of one section of society.

Here are a few things which will make life simpler for everybody:

1. Muslims don’t hate Jews, Christians, Hindus, etc.

2. Muslim Women are independent, intelligent, beautiful, work, run huge companies, smart, and DO drive.

3. Muslims were not born suicide bombers.

4. Muslims do not love blowing up buildings and killing innocent people. Nor do we support terrorists who do.

5. Muslims did not celebrate or have a big party when the World Trade Centre was bombed or every time there is a bomb attack in any Western city

6. Muslims children are not taught to kill non-Muslims and go to school like all other regular people.

7. Muslims DO NOT want to force others into following Islam

8. Muslims however do want to be respected and treated equally for their own set of values and beliefs which DO NOT harm any body else.

The above things are simple and should help people understand Islam, if you don’t understand what is written about then you are a true racist moron and are truly a BIG problem for the entire Earth.

peacceSyed Mohammad Masoom Abidi

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Islamic Unity

Islamic Unity

 

As-Salam-o-Alaikum

“And hold fast by the covenant of Allah all together and be not disunited, and remember the favour of Allah on you when you were enemies, then He united your hearts so by His favour you became brothers; and you were on the brink of a pit of fire, then He saved you from it; thus does Allah make clear to you His communications that you may follow the right way.” (Al-Qur’an 3:103)

We believe in the oneness of the Creator, our Lord, Allah, the Glorifies, the Most High, and in the message of His final prophet Muhammad, may the peace and blessings of Allah be upon him. Our Lord commands us to unity through the final revelation, the Holy Qur’an, and through the example of His final messenger, the Prophet Muhammad (pbuh).

Unfortunately, today the scourges of disunity and sectarianism are tearing the Ummah apart. For too long, the enemies of Islam and Muslims have been allowed to sow the seeds of hatred between Muslim brothers and sisters, resulting in bloodshed and destruction.

The time has come for Muslims to stand against such cruelty and injustice, falsely committed in the name of Islam. Accordingly, we call upon Muslims to: –Denounce all forms of disunity, including racism, nationalism, and sectarianism, committed by individuals, organizations and governments around the world.

Unite in our stance against all attempts to divide the Ummah, in accordance with Ayah 3:103 of the Qur’an and the authentic traditions of the Prophet Muhammad, may the peace and blessings of Allah be upon him. –Commit ourselves to the promotion of good relations between all Muslims, based on Islamic etiquette (adab).

We make this statement to take an Islamic stance of unity against all divisive policies and actions.

Syed Mohamad masoom Abidi

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“Khat jo Maula ke naam bheja hai”

peace

.

Khat jo Maula ke naam bheja hai”
Jab banaam.e Imam bheja hai

Khat jo Maula ke naam bheja hai”
Jab banaam.e Imam bheja hai

Khat baSad eHtraam bheja ha

Ik areezeh per apna Gam likh kar
Apne aaqaa ke naam bheja hai

Jaanasheen.e “Ali” ki Khidmat meN
Har Gam.e subH.o.shaam bheja hai

Mauj.e darya ka shukriya jis ne
Khat bohat tezgaam bheja hai

Jo bane haiN Yazeed.e daur.e rawaaN
Likh ker un sub ka naam bheja hai

Dil tha mushtaaq.e baadaa.e deedaar
Khat nahiN Khaalee jaam bheja hai

Mauj.e darya se poochte haiN Imaam
Kis ne kya kya payaam bheja hai

MushkileN kyooN nah hal hoN ai :Jawaid:
Khat jo Muala ke naam bheja hai
By
Jawaid Badauni

peacee

Syed Mohammad Masoom Abidi

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Mera pyaam dahshatgard ke naam

 peace

.

Mera pyaam dahshatgard ke naam

hai na koii tera muzhab aur na koii hai watan
kaun sa muzhab sikhata hai yeh dahshat ka chalan
deeN se tujhko kya Garaz too apni nafrat meN magan
bAAd meN ban na MusamaaN pahle too insaan ban

tujhse dahshatgard deen.e “Mustafa” badnaam hai
such to yeh hai ai bashar too dushman.e Islaam hai

zulm karta hai nihattoN per ibaadat maanker
haaye too haq ke taqazoN se hai kitna beKhabar
kitne mAsoomoN ko mara kar diye barbaad ghar
kya jihad isko hi kahte haiN zara mAlum kar

ho sake to rok dey ab roz ka yeh qatl.e aam
ik nihattay bezarar ki jaan lena hai haraam

too ne dekhi hai kisee maidaaN meN jung-e “Murtaza”?
pahle dushman se yeh kahte thay keh too imaan la
phir yeh kahte thay keh maiN jaata hooN too bhi lauT ja
jung ki ik baar bhee karte nah thay woh ibteda

aise hote haiN musalmaaN aise hota hai jihad
kuch to eemaaN ke taqazoN ko samajh ai namuraad

rakh ke “bum” too bhag jata hai wahaN se beKhatar
teri is Harkat se marte haiN bohat se bezarar
ChithRe ban kar jism insaanon ke jate haiN bikhar
maaN ki aaGoshoN meN mar jate haiN maaoN ke pisar

waah teri jung aur tera yeh andaaz.e jihad
ai sipahee marhaba haq ke mujahid zindabAAd

manta hooN zulm hum per bhi howey haiN behisab
Khood ba Khood hona hai har zalim ko ik din benaqaab
aur bhi Halaat ho jate haiN dahshat se kharaab
ai bashar dahshat nahiN duniya meN dahshat ka jawab

ho sake to baat dahshatgard meri maan le
woh MusalmaN hi nahiN jo bezarar ki jaan ley

(Bezarar means harmless)

Jawaid Badauni
Muscat –Oman

peaceeSyed Mohammad Masoom Abidi

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Peace, Brotherhood and Humanity….

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