Tag Archives: Peace

IRAN’S response to US President Barack Obama’s Nowruz message

    IRAN’S response to US President Barack Obama’s Nowruz message of goodwill . You change, our behaviour will change.”(IRAN President)

    Ayatollah Ali Khamenei said : We will judge you by your actions not your words. He (Obama) insulted the Islamic Republic of Iran from the first day. If you are right that change has come, where is that change? What is the sign of that change? Make it clear for us what has changed?

    Khamenei asked how Obama could congratulate Iranians on the new year and accuse the country of supporting terrorism and seeking nuclear weapons in the same message.

    Ayatullah Khamenei asked Obama “Have you releasedIranian assets? Have you lifted oppressive sanctions? Have you given up mudslinging and making accusations against the great Iranian nation and its officials?

    Iranian President Mahmoud Ahmadinejad has said Iran would welcome talks with the U.S. _ but only if there was mutual respect. Iranian officials have said that means the U.S. needs to stop accusing Iran of seeking to build nuclear weapons and supporting terrorism, charges Tehran has denied.
    On Friday, an Ahmadinejad adviser played down Obama’s video, saying “minor changes will not end the differences” between Tehran and Washington.

    Ayatullah Khamenai said “They say we have stretched a hand toward Iran. … If a hand is stretched covered with a velvet glove but it is cast iron inside, that makes no sense,”.

Sunni Muslims demand ban of Zakir Naik’s talk

 PeaceOn November 8, 2008, members of India’s premier Sunni Muslim organisation, Raza Academy came together to demand a ban on Zahir Naik’s programme ‘Insaniyat Ke Liye Hal’ to be held from November 14-23 at Somaiya grounds.

Maulana Ashraf Raza of the Darul-Uloom Hanfia Rizvia, Colaba also issued a fatwa against Naik. Members alleged that Naik had made derogatory statements about Islam’s prophet. Maulanas from the All India Sunni Tableeq Community were present.
Members complained that on many occasions Naik had urged crowds to pray to Allah alone instead of Prophet Mohammed Paigambar, as he claims the prophet is human.  READ MORE

The fatwa factory of Darul Uloom Deo-Band has issued a Verdict against this Nalayak

Q– Kindly also thru light on the knowledge & working of Dr. Zakir Naik who is famous for his comparative religion lectures & debates, also runs a Tv channel by the name of PEACE TV. JazakAllah Wa Assalaam

Ans
We do not have details about Dr. Zakir Naik, only we know that he is an agent of Ghair Muqallideen, away from knowledge and wisdom, spreading mischievous things and misguiding simple Muslims to wrong path.

Zakir nair declared kafir by ahla sunnat wal Jamaat

Know Zakir Nair by his Own lectures

Terror In The Name Of God

Terror In The Name Of God

Know that the worldly life is only a game, a temporary attraction, a means of boastfulness among yourselves and a place for multiplying your wealth and children. It is like the rain which produces plants that are attractive to the unbelievers. These plants flourish, turn yellow, and then become crushed bits of straw. In the life hereafter there will be severe torment or forgiveness and mercy from God. The worldly life is only an illusion.(The Quran, Al-Hadid: 20)

“There is no Hindu, there is no Muslim” (Baba Guru Nanak Sahib)

The Quran does not give permission to kill innocent people, said AQyouth Secretary Maulana Ali akbar Qummi….

While most of the major world religions(hindus,Muslims, christians ect are based on peace, most terrorists are religious fundamentalists — using violence in the name of God, Allah, or Jesus.

Prohibitions on Terrorism, and Exhortations to Living with Mercy, Compassion and Patience in the  Holy Qur’an.

Whosoever kills an innocent human being, it shall be as if he has killed all mankind, and whosoever saves the life of one, it shall be as if he had saved the life of all mankind. (5:32)

So if any group or indivodual acts goes against teachings of holy quran and declare his war as a jihad in in fact a hypocrite, which is also explaine in Holy quran like this..

Some people say, “We believe in God and the Day of Judgment,” but they are not true believers They deceive God and the believers. However, they have deceived no one but themselves, a fact of which they are not aware. A sickness exists in their hearts to which God adds more sickness. Besides this, they will suffer a painful punishment as a result of the lie which they speak .When they are told not to commit corruption in the land, they reply, “We are only reformers” .They, certainly, are corrupt but do not realize it .(2:8). to 2:12). 

Now a days sucide group, sucide bomb ect are very comman among some self-styled jihadist groups…. and also in some extremist of other religion Now see What the Holy quran says…

O you who believe! Do not eat up your wealth in vanities among yourselves. But let there be among yourselves trade conducted in mutual good will. Nor kill or destroy yourselves, for God has been most merciful to you. If any do that in rancor and injustice, soon shall we cast them into the fire, and that is easy for God. If you but avoid the most heinous of the things which are forbidden to do, we shall expel out of you all the evil in you and admit you to a gate of great honor. (4:29-31

Hinduism is all-inclusive and does not permit resorting to Adharma as a means to uphold Dharma . And killing innocent civilians is undoubtedly Adharma .

no-religion

In fact it is a known fact Killing innocent is not allowed in any religion then why people add terriorist before any religion and why terror in the name of God?

There is nothing like ‘Hindu terrorism’ or ‘Muslim terrorism’, anyone killing innocents is a terrorist,” RSS chief K S Sudarshan said on the sidelines of a RSS meeting here.

The city of Mumbai is slowly recovering from the terrible shock of the  wednesday, 26th November 2008,gone by. Many of the dead have been buried.The firing is over but the lives of Mumbaikers transformed forever.

This is the time to pray for the deceased souls and a time to remember the brave people who saved many. Some of those brave men are lucky to be alive today, othere were not so lucky.

This is a right time Join hands together in the name of  Humanity and fight against terriorism not against any Religion….

Terrorism is a crime against humanity.

Whosoever kills a human being for other than manslaughter or mischief in the land,
it shall be as if he has killed all humankind, and whosoever saves the life of one,
it shall be as if he has saved the life of all humankind.

(Holy Quran .Chapter 5, Verse 32)

Today we are living in the twentyfirst centuary when man has the power to destroy anything.People have a synonimous approach of linking terrorismwith specific religion .Even though Muslims are implicated for various terrorist plots, one must not judge all by the actions of a few.Use of latest techniques and constant innovation of latest weapons has made terriorism one of the most worrying forces of the world. Sucidal squad, explosive planted in crowded places has made it more deadly.

Now a days the  term ‘terrorist’ or ‘terrorism’ is frequently used to refer Muslims. In fact, whenever any terrorist attack occurs in any part of the globe, without knowing the facts all Muslims are blamed worldwide. Such remarks hurt the sentiments of the true followers of Islam, but they can’t change the mindset.

The Question comes in our mind ,Why are only Muslims suspected behind every blast? Everbody knows all muslims are not terririst and follow Holy quran which give message of Peace and Brotherhood.


Read these exampes:
Bomb that exploded at 9.35 pm on Monday in Malegaon, September 30.

News papers Reported” The motorcycle was parked near a row of shops, directly beneath the first floor office of SIMI. The office had been sealed after the organisation was banned in 2001. The 2006 blasts were blamed on SIMI and nine people were arrested but the trial in the case has been stayed by the Supreme Court over a legal challenge. “

Source

Now after 20 days news started to come “Hindu group behind Malegaon blast”
Maharashtra Anti-Terrorism Squad (ATS) has arrested three persons including a woman in connection with September 29 Malegaon blast, which killed six persons and injured 90 others. The blast occurred just in front of the sealed office of the banned outfit, the Students Islamic Movement of India (SIMI) in central Malegaon.

On Friday (October 23), the ATS produced them before a Nashik court, which remanded them to police custody till November 3. The arrested woman Pragya Singh Thakur is a Sadvhi (woman monk). According to ATS the motorcycle in which the bomb was belonged to the 38 year old Sadhvi.

Source

Fact is that, terrorist does not belong to any religion, they target the whole humanity through their misdeeds. It depends on the responsible citizen of the world how they perceive the things around. Leaving behind the religious boundaries, we all should come to a single platform and unite to fight against terrorism worldwide. If we raise finger against a particular religion for the terrorists’ activities, then we are certainly making way easier for those who are involved in such menace.

Judge any Religion  by their Books not by the actions of few extreamist groups or  individuals.
Terror and religion are completely opposed to each other. Terrorism adopts the way of aggression, murder, conflict, cruelty and misery. But according to the Qur’an, all these things are kinds of oppression. God enjoins peace, harmony, goodwill and compromise. He forbids terror and every kind of act that does not promote peace, and, condemns those who commit such acts.

Those who believe and do not mix up their belief with any wrongdoing, they are the ones who are safe… (Qur’an, 6:82)
The founder of Russian Anarchy, Michael Bakunin and his disciple Nechayev define an ideal terrorist in this way: The whole work of his [a revolutionist’s] existence, not only in words, but also in deeds, is at war with the existing order of society, and with the whole so-called civilized world, with its laws, morals and customs, he is an uncompromising opponent… He knows only one science; the science of destruction. (The Alarm Newspaper Article, “Bakunin’s Ground-Work for the Social Revolution,” 1885 Dec. 26, p. 8)
Holy Quran says:
O You who believe! Enter absolutely into peace (Islam). Do not follow in the footsteps of Satan. He is an outright enemy to you. (Qur’an, 2:208)
Do not pursue what you have no knowledge of. Hearing, sight and hearts will all be questioned. (Qur’an, 17:36)
God commands you to return to their owners the things you hold in trust and, when you judge between people, to judge with justice. How excellent is what God exhorts you to do! God is All-Hearing, All-Seeing.
(Qur’an, 4:58)
But do not obey any vile swearer of oaths, any backbiter, slandermonger, impeder of good, evil aggressor, gross, coarse and furthermore, despicable.(Qur’an, 68:10-13)
Terrorists aim to damage people both physically and psychologically to attain a certain goal. Morals of religion, however, is opposed to terrorism in that it aims to foster love, well-being, compassion, joy and hope in society. Who would like to describe Hitler or the likes of Ku Klux Klan as good Christians? We should not let our emotions overcome our logic and understanding. There is no religious scripture that does not condemn terrorism. Every righteous person in any religion would condemn such actions regardless of terrorist’s race, country or religious background.
we all should come to a single platform and unite to fight against terrorism worldwide.

By S.M.MAsoom

Flowers are raining outside the Eidgah ,Sikh community welcomes the Muslims

https://i0.wp.com/www.alqaim.info/unity/wp-content/uploads/2007/10/sikhs.jpg

The flowers are raining outside the Eidgah. The beauty of this picture lies in the fact that Sikh boys are welcoming the Muslims coming out of Eidgah after offering the Namaz, with flowers.
The Sikh community welcomes the Muslims after Namaz in Bhopal, as a goodwill gesture. For decades the office-bearers of local Sikh organisations have been greeting Muslims ‘Eid Mubarak’ in this manner.Naturally, such a gesture overwhelms the other community. Reaching out to the other community is the need of the hour. We must celebrate the festivals of the other community and spread the message of harmony.

Such photographs are rare as people are getting narrow-minded and don’t prefer interacting with other communities and groups. Working relationships are okay but family ties are not as strong as they used to be in the past.
Here there is no political platform but the ordinary Sikhs meeting ordinary Muslims. And this is the spirit of Hindustaniat. Kudos to the Sikh organisations who take this extra step towards reaching to the other community.

This photo has a lesson for everybody among us to learn. Will we?

Taken From

Adult education in islam part one

THE ISLAMIC SEXUAL MORALITY :THE STRUCTURE by Sayyid Muhammad Rizvi

 In this chapter we will first talk about marriage at the age of puberty, then we will examine the possible ways of handling sexual urges if one decides not to marry soon after puberty, and finally we will discuss comprehensively about marriage procedure and sexual techniques.

A. PUBERTY:
THE BEGINNING OF SEXUAL LIFE

Sexual desire is aroused in human beings at the age of puberty. In Islamic legal definition, puberty (bulugh) is determined by one of the followings:

1. age: fifteen lunar years for boys and nine for girls;
2. internal changes:
In boys: The first nocturnal emission. Semen accumulates in the testicles from puberty onwards and more semen may be formed than the system can assimilate; when this happens, semen is expelled during the sleep. This is known as nocturnal emission and wet dream or ihtlam in Arabic. In girls: Menstruation. Right from their birth, the girls’ ovaries contains about 400,000 immature eggs; at puberty, the eggs start maturing, usually one ovum each month. If no egg is fertilized, the egg together with the lining of the womb is discarded in form of what is known as menstruation and monthly period or hayz in Arabic.
3. physical change
Growth of coarse hair on lower part of abdomen. Since sexual urge begins at puberty and as Islam says that sexual urge should be fulfilled only through marriage, therefore, it has allowed marriage as soon as the boy and the girl reach the age of puberty. In case of girls, it not only allows them to be married as soon as they become mature, but also recommends such marriage. It is based on such teachings that Islam discourages girls from postponing their marriage because of education; instead, it says that girls should get married and then continue their education if they wish to do so.

But just physical maturity by itself is not enough for a married life, rushed (maturity of mind) is equally important. On the other hand, however, our present way of life has become so much complicated that there has appeared a considerable gap between puberty and maturity -both in financial and social affairs. A recent article on the American youths says, “[Y]oung Americans entering the 21st century are far less mature than their ancestors were at the beginning of the 20th. The difference is evident in all areas of youthful development: sex, love, marriage, education and work. Physically, today’s youths are maturing earlier than previous generations, but emotionally they are taking much longer to develop adult attachments.”1 Consequently, it is not easy for boys and girls of our atomic age to marry as they become physically mature.

So what how should the youths handle their sexual urge? What can the Muslims do about their next generation? In spite of the problem mentioned above, I believe there are ways by which Muslim youths in their late teens can get married without worrying about the financial aspect. Here I can suggest three possibilities::
1. If the parents are well to do and can support their young married children till they are financially independent, then I would strongly suggest that they encourage their children to marry and support them till they can stand on their own. While talking about the contract of freedom made between a slave and his master, the Qur’an says, “… and give them of the wealth of Allah which He has given you …” (24:33) If Islam puts so much emphasis on financially supporting one’s freed slave (so that he may stand on his own feet), it is needless to say how virtuous it would be to help one’s own children to stand on their feet!
On a broader level, the Muslim organizations should create funds (e.g., long term interest-free loans) to support the young Muslims who want to get married but lack financial resources. Once a person guilty of indecent sexual behaviour was brought to Imam ‘Ali. After punishing him, the Imam arranged for his marriage at the expenses of the government. The Imam set an example of how the society can help the youths in starting a family life. By looking at the situation in the Western world, the Muslim organizations should at least morally feel obliged to provide such support for their youths. This is not a matter of charity, it is a matter of surviving as a Muslim community in a hostile environment.
2. The boy and the girl can do their ‘aqd (marriage contract) but postpone the marriage ceremony till after they have finished their education. In other words, they would be married but still staying with their parents. They can meet each other without any shari’ah objection; and if they decide to have relations, then they should use permissible contraceptive means to delay the child-bearing process. In this way, they would be able to fulfill their sexual desire and be free from financial responsibilities.

3. The boy and girl can do their ‘aqd and even the marriage ceremony but delay the child-bearing process AND adopt a very simple life-style. Thus they will be able to fulfill their sexual desire and also be free from heavy financial burden.
However, I cannot overemphasize the importance of the role played by parents in supervision of all such arrangements. I would not at all support the idea that a boy and a girl decide such matters on their own without the parents’ input or without registering such arrangements at the community center. This will protect the reputation of the girl in case things do not work out properly. Moreover, what I have suggested above also means that parents and youngsters both will have to radically change their outlook towards the materialistic aspect of life. They will have to adopt a very simple life-style. If today’s youths intend to have a ‘standard’ financial footing before getting into marriage, then it will not be possible in the late teens; they will have to wait till they are above thirties! The article mentioned above says that the youths “are marrying later than their parents did -partly for economic reason- and many college graduates are postponing marriage beyond age 30.”1
One important benefit of these suggestions is that a youngsters of college age will be free from sexual anxieties and will be able to concentrate fully on his or her studies. On the other hand, if a Muslim youth raised in the Western society without any religious upbringing is not provided with financial and moral support by his parents, then he will most probably melt in the permissive culture that tolerates teenage sex outside marriage And if this happens, God forbid, the youth will not longer regard sexual relationship as a matter of value or commitment. “Most of us got one-night stands out of our system in college,” writes Nancy Smith, 25, in a recent essay for The Washington Post on her generation’s struggle with adulthood. “Sex outside a relationship is not so much a matter of right or wrong as: Is it really worth the hassle?”2 And this type of sexual behaviour has serious social consequences: abortions; unwanted babies; increase in divorce ratio and single-parent families. Add to this the emotional suffering the people in general and the children in particular go through in such crisis.

 

Marriage & Sex

 

SOME OFTEN ASKED QUESTIONS

 

By syed Mohammad Rizvi

 

Q) Do parents have any right over the marriage of their children?

Ans: The father and paternal grandfather have full authority over the children who have not yet reached the age of puberty. When a child reaches the age of puberty, then there are three different situations:—-

  1. a child who is baligh but not mentally mature: in this case, the father and the grandfather still have their authority over him or her. Such a child cannot take a decision on marriage without the approval of the father or the grandfather.
  2. a male child is baligh and also mentally mature: in this case, he has full right to decide about his own marriage.
    (c) a girl who is baligha and mentally mature: There are four different opinions on this issue. But the majority of the present mujtahids say that in her first marrige, a baligha and mentally girl cannot marry without the permission of her father or grandfather.. And if such a girl had already married before, then she has full right to decide for herself in case of her second marriage.

This law is in place to act as an extra protection to the honour of a teenage girl. On the other hand, if the father or grandfather refuses to give his consent to a proposal of a suitable man, then the girl can approach a religious judge whose decision will supersede that of her father.

 Q 2) By considering the issue of hijab in Islam, is a boy permitted to look at the girl before marrying her?

Man is allowed to see without hijab the woman whom he intends to marry. However, this permission is just for the man or the woman to see the perspective spous once; it is not a perpetual license to go out together! I strongly recommend that this should be done in supervision of the parents or the guardians.

Sharaya’, p.493; Sharh Lum’ah, vol.2, p.67; ‘Urwah, p.625; Minhaj, vol.2, p.253; Tahrir, vol.2, p.254; Tazkirah, vol.2, p.572; an-Nihayah, p.484.

But if two persons who are engaged with to meet each other and go out, then there is a way to legalize that Islamically. This can be done by performing mut’ah marriage between the fiance and the fiancee. They can even put a condition in the mut’ah that there will be no sexual relations. This way, they will be able to meet each other without any objection from the shari’ah. This method can also be adopted by those who wish to go through the engagement ceremony.
However, as mentioned earlier, a girl who has not married before, will need her father’s or grandfather’s approval even in such a mut’ah marriage.

Q 3) Are there any special days in the Islamic calendar when marriage is encouraged or discouraged? Basically marriage is allowed at all times?

However, there are some days on which marriage is not recommended; some of these are based on ahadith and some on cultural, historical reasons. Generally, we can categorize these days into three:
(a) There are some ahadith which say that it is makruh (not recommended) to have marriage ceremony on the days when the moon is in the direction of the Scorpio (this is known as al-qamar fi aqrab or qamar dar aqrab), during the last two or three days of the lunar months, and on Wednesdays.
(b) There are some ahadith which says that certain days of each month are ill-omen days (nahas); these days are the 3rd, 5th, 16th, 21st, 24th and 25th of lunar months.

However, the ahadith for both the above categories would not stand the scrutiny of the scholars of hadith. Our mujtahids do not normally apply their full expertise in matters not related to obligatory or prohibitive commands. They relax the criteria for acceptability of ahadith in matters related to sunnat and makruh acts. This is known in usulu ‘l-fiqh as “qa’idatu ‘t-tasamuh,” that is, the rule of leniency (in ascertaining the acceptability of hadith) This has been mentioned very clearly by Ayatullah al-Khu’i in his manual of fatwas. He says, “Most of the mustahab acts mentioned in the chapters of this book are based on the qa’idatu ‘t-tasamuh in sources of the sunnat acts. Therefore, whatever has not been proved sunnat in our view should be done with intention of raja’il matlubiyyah. The same applies to the makruh acts; these should be abstained from with the intention of raja’il matlubiyyah.
As far as the two categories for marriage days are concerned, it will suffice to quote Ayatullah Gulpayegani, one of the leading mujtahids of our time who says: “One may follow these mustahab and makruh acts with the intention of raja’il matlubiyyah, because there is no clear evidence for some of these things.”

There are certain days of the Islamic calendar which have become associated with the early events of the Islamic history; for example, the 10th of Muharram is the day of mourning for the massacre at Karbala or the day of the Prophet’s death in Safar, etc. Since such days are commemorated by the Muslims as days of mourning, it is socially and, to some extent, religiously not recommended to have a marriage ceremony on such days.

 

The Wedding Night:

I must explain why I have written wedding ‘night’ and not ‘day’. Wasa’il, vol.14, p.62. The hadith says, ‘Take the bridge to her new home during the night,”1 Based on this saying, it is recommended that wedding should take place at night. After all, Allah has made the night “so that you may rest in it.” (10:67)
After the bride has entered the room, the groom is recommended to take off the bride’s shoes, was her feet (in a washbowl) and then sprinkle the water around the room.

Then the groom should be wuzu and pray two rak’at sunnat prayer and then recite the following du’a:

 Allahummar zuqni ulfataha wa wuddaha wa rizaha bi; war zini biha, wajma’ baynana bi ahsani ijtima’in wa anfasu i’tlafin; fa innaka tuhibbul halal wa tukrihul haram

(O Allah! bless me with her affection, love and her acceptance of me; and make me pleased with her, and bring us together in the best form of a union and in absolute harmony; surely You like lawful things and dislike unlawful things.)

Then he should ask the bride to do wuzu and pray two rak’at sunnat prayer.

When they are ready to go to bed, the groom should put his hand on the bride’s forehead and pray the following du’a while facing the qiblah. (So those going on honey moon in a foreign country, don’t forget your qiblah compass!)

 Allahumma bi amanatika akhaztuha wa bi kalimatika ‘s-tahaltuha. Fa in qazayta li minha waladan, faj’alhu mubarakan taqiyyah min Shi’ati Al-i muhammad (sal-lal-lahu alayhi wa alihi wa sallam) wa la taj-‘al lish shaytani fihi shirkan wa la nasiba.

(O Allah! I have taken her as Your trust and have made her lawful for myself by Your words. Therefore, if you have decreed for me a son from her, then make him blessed and pious from among the followers of the Family of Muhammad [peace be upon him and them]; and do not let the Satan have any part in him.) al-‘Urwah, p.624

“They ask you about menstruation. Say: Menstruation is a discomfort (for women). Do not establish sexual relations with them during the menses and do not approach them (sexually) until the blood stops. Then when they have cleansed themselves, you go into them as Allah has commanded you.” (2:222)

According to the shari’ah, the duration of the monthly period is more than three and less than ten days. If the bleeding was for less than three days, it is menstruation; if it is for more than ten days, then it was menstruation for ten days and then it is counted as istihazah, irregular bleeding during which sex is permitted The prohibition of sex during the period is limited strictly to sexual intercourse; other intimate contact (with the exception of the vagina and anus) is allowed. However, it is better not to play with her body between the naval and the knees.
If a person who is engaged in sexual intercourse with his wife discovers that her periods has begun, then he should immediately withdraw from her.
It is clear from the verse mentioned above (until the blood stops) that once the blood was stopped, intercourse becomes lawful even if the woman has not performed the major ritual ablution (ghusl). But on the basis of the subsequent sentence (then when they have cleansed themselves …), most mujtahids say that it is better to refrain from intercourse till she performs the ghusl or, at least, washes her private parts Wasa’il, vol.1, p.576.

Sexual intercourse is also not allowed during the post-natal bleeding (10 days), during daytime in the month of Ramadhan, and when a person is in ihram during the pilgrimage to Mecca.
At all other times, sexual intercourse is allowed.

 

Q )Is it discouraged (makruh) to have sex at any time or on any day?

There are certain ahadith which say that sexual intercourse during some days and at some times is makruh, but not haram. These days and times are as follows:
i. during frightful natural occurences, e.g., eclipse, hurricane, earthquake;
ii. from sunset till maghrib;
iii. from dawn till sunrise;
iv. the last three nights of lunar months;
v. eve of the 15th of every lunar month;
vi. eve of 10th Zil-hijjah;
vii. after becoming junub.
Some of these are self-explanatory: I don’t think any one would be in the mood for sexual intercourse during a hurricane or earthquake. The second and third example are of the prayer times; obviously, a Muslim is expected to spend that time in meditation and prayer. But remember, it is makruh, not haram to have sexual intercourse at these time. Moreover, the hadith for the such issues have been accepted on basis of the qa’idatu ‘t-tasamuh mentioned earlier. Thirdly, the reasons given for this karahat are mostly about possible deformity of a child conceived at that time. By looking at these reasons, I am inclined to restrict this karahat only in cases of couples who plan to have children, and not extend it to those who practise birth control. I would therefore advise the readers to be considerate to each other and not to put your spouse in unnecessary tension; if your spouse is very sensitive about these makruh days, then try to accommodate your likes and dislikes accordingly. Mutual understanding is the key.

Q ) Are there days and times when sexual intercourse is recommended?

Yes, we have certain ahadith which say that it is better to have sexual intercourse at these times:
i. Sunday night;
ii. Monday night;
iii. Wednesday night;
iv. Thursday noon;
v. Thursday night;
vi. Friday evening;
vii. whenever the wife wants to have sex.
Thursday & Friday are weekends in Islamic calendar!

* Are there times when it is obligatory (wajib) to have sexual intercourse?
Yes! It is wajib on man to have sex with his wife at least once in every four months; this is considered as one of the conjugal rights of the wife. This obligation stays in force unless there is a valid excuse or the wife waives her right.

 

SEXUAL TECHNIQUES

Before I start writing anything about sexual techniques, it is necessary to stay that there exist no rules and laws either in foreplay or in intercourse. The only laws and rules are the ones reached by the lovers by mutual, and often unspoken, understanding. Whatever is pleasing and satisfying to both the husband and the wife is right and proper; and whatever is mutually displeasing is wrong. The only limitation to this general rule would be any shari’ah rule which goes against the wishes of the husband or the wife.

* Fore-play:
Man often forgets that woman also has been created with the same desires as man. Asbagh bin Nubatah quotes Imam ‘Ali that, “Almighty God created sexual desires in ten parts: then He gave nine parts to women and one to men.” But then Allah also gave them “equal parts of shyness. . Wasa’il, vol.14, p.40.

” Many times this shyness makes the man ignore the desires of his wife.
Based on this reality, Islam emphasizes on fore-play. Imam ‘Ali says, “When you intend to have sex with your wife, do not rush because the woman (also) have needs (which should be fulfilled).” Ibid, p.83

Sex without fore-play has been equated to cruelty. The Prophet said, “Three people are cruel: … a person who has sex with his wife without foreplay3. Ibid.

Another hadith equates sex without foreplay to animal behaviour; “When anyone of you has sex with his wife, then he should not go to them like birds; instead he should be slow and delaying.” 4. Ibid, p.82.

 

The Prophet said, “No one among you should have sex with his wife like animals; rather there should be a messenger between them.” When asked about the messenger, he said, “It means kissing and talking.” . Tahzibu ‘l-Ihya’, vol.3, p.110.

Imam Ja’far as-Sadiq has been quoted as follows: “… there should be mutual foreplay between them because it is better for sex.” . Wasa’il, p.82.

The Prophet said, “… every play of a believer is void except in three cases: horse-riding, archery and mutual foreplay with his wife -these are haqq.” Ishaq bin ‘Ammar asked Imam Ja’far as-Sadiq whether a person can look at his wife while she is naked? The Imam said, “There is no problem in that. Is enjoyment other than that?!” Ibid, p.85.

As for the role of woman in sexual foreplay, the Imam have praised a wife who discards shyness when she is with her husband. A hadith was quoted earlier from Imam ‘Ali which said that woman have been given nine-tenth of the sexual desire but Allah has also given them nine-tenth of shyness.

I had promised in chapter two to explain the rationale behind this hadith. There might seem a contradiction in this act of God, but it is not so. Both the sexual desire and the shyness have been placed for very specific purpose. The sexual desire is to be unleashed, yes unleashed, when a woman is with her husband, but it must be shielded with shyness when she is with other people.

This has been very eloquently explained by Imam Muhammad al-Baqir when he said, “The best woman among you is the one who discards the armour of shyness when she undresses for her husband, and puts on the armour of shyness when she dresses up again.” Ibid, p.14-16.

These sayings clearly show that the husband and the wife should feel completely free when they are engaged in mutual stimulation which is known as foreplay. There is nothing wrong, according to Islam, for a woman to be active and responsive during sex. This is diametrically opposed to the sexual morality of the Christian West world during the pre-sexual revolution era. Russell says, Western women of a generation or two ago can recall being warned by their mothers that sexual intercourse was an unpleasant duty which they owned to their husbands, and that they were ‘to lie still and think of England’.”1 What else but a sexual revolt could such a morality breed?

As for the Islamic shari’ah, all the mujtahids are unanimous in saying that the act of sexual foreplay in itself is mustahab (recommended). Likewise, it is recommended not to rush into sexual intercourse. The operative word is mutual pleasure and satisfaction.

* Techniques of Foreplay:
As far as the methods of mutual stimulation in foreplay are connected, the shari’ah allows the husband and the wife to see, kiss, touch, smell and stimulate any part of each other’s body. Therefore, oral sex, as it is known in this part of the world is allowed.

 

Imam Musa al-Kazim was onced asked, “Can a person kiss his wife’s vagina?” The Imam said, “No problem.”1 The only restriction is that no foreign object should be used. And this restriction is quite understandable: nothing can really substitute the things Allah has created in our bodies!
The restriction I am placing on the use of foreign objects is based on the following hadith. ‘Ubaydullah bin Zurarah says that he had an old neighbour who owned a young slave-girl. Because of his old age, he could not fully satisfy the young slave-girl during sexual intercourse. She would therefore ask him to place his fingers in her vagina as she liked it. The old man complied her wishes even though he did not like this idea. So he requested ‘Ubaydullah to ask Imam ‘Ali ar-Riza about it. When ‘Ubaydullah asked the Imam about it, the Imam said, “There is no problem as long as he uses any part of his own body upon her, but he should not use any thing other than his body on her.” Wasa’il, vol.14, p.77.

In earlier discussion, we said that masturbation (i.e., self-stimulation of one’s own sexual organ till emission of semen or orgasm) is not allowed. However, in case of married persons, there is no problem if the wife stimulates her husband’s penis till the emission of semen or the husband stimulates his wife’s vagina till orgasm. This is allowed because it does not come under “self-stimulation;” it is stimulation by a lawful partner.

The Qur’an clearly says that, “The believers are … those who protect their sexual organs by a lawful partner surely comes under the definition of protecting one’s organs “except from their spouses.”

* Sexual Intercourse:
Is there any particular position for sexual intercourse which is forbidden in Islam? No! As far as the basic coital positions are concerned, there is no restrictions. I am using the term ‘basic coital positions’ for the positions known as the man above, face to face; woman above face to face; side position, face to face; rear-entry position in which the husband penetrates the vagina from the rear. Actually, the shari’ah has left it on the husband and the wife to explore and experiment as they wish.
In the early Islamic period, an event took place which clarified this issue for all. The people of Medina, influenced by the Jews, used man-above face to face position during sexual intercourse; whereas the Meccans liked to experiment various positions. After the migration of Muslims to Medina, a Meccan married a Medinese woman and wanted to have sex with her in his own way. The woman refused and said that he can have sex only in one position. The case was reported to the Prophet; so Allah revealed the verse saying “Your women are a tilth for you, so go into your tilth as you like.” (2:223) That is, in any position. al-Mizan, vol.3 (English translation) p.319.

 

However, it is makruh to adopt a standing position, or to face the qiblah or keep it on the backside during the intercourse.
It is advisable to refrain from the acrobatic positions given by some sexologists of the East and the West which might even cause physical harm. Remember, the basic rule is mutual pleasure and flexibility. If one partner does not like a particular position, then the other should yield to his or her feelings.

* Anal Intercourse:
The opinions of our mujtahids vary on the permissibility of anal intercourse. This variance in fatwas is because of the difference in the ahadith we have on this issue.
There is a hadith, for example, from Imam Ja’far as-Sadiq quoting the Prophet that “The anus of women is haram for my community.” Wasa’il, vol.14, p.104.

Now this hadith categorically forbids anal intercourse. But the chain of narrators of this hadith is not completely flawless. See Tazkirah, vol.2, p.576-7; Shahid’s Masalik, vol.3, p.303

 

On the other hand, we have an authentic hadith in which ‘Abdullah bin Abi Ya’fur asked Imam Ja’far as-Sadiq about a man who had had intercourse in the anus of his wife.

The Imam said, “There is no problem in it if she agrees.”

‘Abudllah, “Then what do you say about the statement of Allah that ‘Then go into them as Allah has commanded you’?” The Imam replied, “This command is about seeking children, it means seek children as Allah has commanded you. But he also says, ‘Your women are a tilth for you, therefore go to your tilth as you like Wasa’il,, vol.14, p.103.

When a mujtahid is faced which such conflicting ahadith, he has to see whether he can bring them together or not. In our case, the mujtahids have taken the more authentic hadith which approve anal intercourse as a qualifier for the ahadith which totally forbid such sex. Especially so with the reference to the Qur’anic verses found in the approving ahadith. And in conclusion, they say that the prohibition in the above mentioned ahadith is not on the level of haram, instead it is on the level of makruh Sharh Lum’ah, vol.2, p.68; Shahid’s Masalik, vol.1, p.438-9.

This conclusion is supported by a third category of the ahadith in which the Imams have clearly discouraged their followers from anal intercourse.
Safwan al-Jammal said to Imam ar-Riza that, “One of your followers has requested me to ask you a question which he himself feels embarrassed to ask you.” The Imam said, “What is it?” Safwan, “It is about a man having sex in his wife’s anus.” The Imam said, “Yes, he can do it.” Then Safwan, who was a close companion, asked, “Do you do it?” The Imam said, “NO! We do not do it.” Wasa’il, vol.14, p.102-3.

 

Therefore the majority of the Shi’ah mujtahids say that anal intercourse is not haram but strongly disliked (karahatan shadidan) provided the wife agrees to it.

And if she does not agree to it, then all mujtahids say that it is precautionarily wajib to refrain from it. al-‘Urwah, p.628.

However, according to Ayatullah al-Khu’i, it is precautionarily wajib to abstain from anal intercourse no matter whether the wife agrees to it or not. Minhaj, vol.1, p.64.
I would strongly advise against anal intercourse because it can be painful and it can cause injury as the area was not designed for that! Moreover, the scientists say that if you engage in anal intercourse, do not mix it with vaginal intercourse because this will lead to infections in some people with yeasts and other organisms which belong in the anus, not in the vagina or the male organ. I like to end this section with the sayings of Imam Ja’far as-Sadiq and Imam ‘Ali ar-Riza about anal intercourse: “Woman is a means of your pleasure, therefore do not harm her. Wasa’il, vol.14, p.101-2.

 

* Decency & Privacy:
There was a time when people need not be reminded of some of the basic moral and ethical values, but now we are living in an era where moral values are changing with the change of the worn-out car tires!
One of such issues is decency in dress at home and privacy at the time of sexual intercourse or intimate contact between husband and wife. There are some people in the West (of course, in minority) who think that it is okay, nay healthy, to stay naked in presence of their children! Ona collective basis, they also organize nude camps. Why? So that the children will not think negatively about their own sexuality. Such parents also feel that there is nothing wrong in sexual intercourse in presence of their children. This behaviour is an example of the extreme reaction to the rigid Christian morality. To protect their children from associating sex with evil, some of these parents go to the extent of completely opening up to their children!
Such behavior is not only condemned by those who still abide by religious moral systems, it is equally condemned by those who are familiar with child psychology. A sexual manual read by millions of Westerners says, “Never involve children in adult sexual activities: militant and exhibitionist liberals who try to acclimatize children to the naturalness of sex by letting them in any level of their own sex lives probably do at least as much harm as was ever done by the prohibitive sex-is-dirty generation.”
We have quite a few ahadith in which the Prophet and the Imams have emphasized that when you engage in sexual intercourse, make sure that no child (or, for that matter, any other person) sees you or hears you.

Abu Basir quotes Imam Ja’far as-Sadiq as follows, “Be careful not to have sex with your wife while a child can see you. The Prophet used to dislike this (attitude) very strongly.” . Wasa’il, vol.14, p.94-5.

If a child sees and hears the parents engaged in sexual intercourse, he or she might go through a shocking psychological experience. It might also create problem in his or her own adult life.

The manual quoted earlier says, “Most young children are biologically programmed to interpret the sight or sound of adult coition as evidence of a violent assault (they are aware of it earlier than you would expect, so don’t keep babies in the bedroom), and the awareness of mother-father sexual relations is on all counts for too explosive a matter to be monkeyed with in the interest of Reichian experiments.”

Islam has laid down cler guide-lines about the privacy of adults. Referring to the children who have not yet reached the age of puberty (bulugh), the Qur’an say:

O you who believe! … Those of you who have not yet reached puberty should ask you for permission (before entering your bedroom during) three times: before the dawn prayer, when you put off your garments at midday (for siesta), and after the night prayer -these are three times of privacy for you. Besides (these three times), there is no blame on you or them if you go to one another (without announcing yourselves). Thus God makes clear to you the signs, and God is All-Knowing, Wise (24:58)

Then referring into the children who have reached the age of puberty, the Qur’an says:

When your children reach puberty, they should ask your permission (at all times before entering your bedrooms) just as those who were before them had asked permission. Thus God makes clear to you the signs, and God is All-Knowing, Wise (24:59)

These two verses give us the following rules about privacy within and without the family circles:
1. There are three times in a day -night, early morning and afternoon- which are considered as times of privacy.

2. The minor children should be taught that during times of privacy they are not allowed to enter into the bedroom of their parents or adults without first asking their permission. Obviously, by minor we do not mean infants; we mean the children who can understand what is right and what is wrong. I would put that at age five and above. The parents will have to ingrain this teaching to their minor children gradually.

3. At other times, the children are free to come and go into the bedroom of their parents without asking for their permission. In retrospect, this means that the parents should be decently dressed at those other times.

4. As for the mature children and adults, the Qur’an is clear that they may enter the bedroom of their parents or other adults at all times only after asking their permission.

(A web From Students Howza Iran

Visit to save your selves from Misguidence)

www.alqaem.org

www.fatmiya.net

Romeo juliat on Messenger

If you are sitting by your Messenger waiting for a Juliat, romeo or Prince Charming to pop up, you might hit the jackpot any moment. But hitting the jackpot is not the end. It is the beginning of what may be and mostly is a bumpy ride.

The Internet revolution has been around for more then a decade. In the past decade 2.5 million American lovers tied the knot after meeting online. Such unions became a part of the Western culture and economy (dating sites made big bucks).
According to the Wall Street Online Journal many of these marriages are going downhill now. The first decade was of excitement, the second one is of consequences.

This article is to examine why internet romance can be frustrating. This category of romance includes lovers who met in the chat room or the dating sites.

Online shopping is attractive because a lot of products of different brands, packages and prices are made easily obtainable. The same is true of Internet dating. A wide variety of individuals of different origins, countries, statuses and interests are available in the brush of a second. The key factor that makes it thrilling is that we imagine more than we observe.

“It’s only words and words are all I have to take your heart away.”-Boy Zone
The person you come across introduces himself or his profile does it for him. Either you believe him or else get going. Take it or leave it.

He narrates who he is and you present yourself to the best of your abilities, and in the process facts are a little warped. (We are not talking about the bizarre incidents where people pretend to be of the opposite gender or different ethnicity.) What we are talking about is hiding bankruptcy, obesity or pretending to be a university professor or living in Manhattan. Consciously or unconsciously, we project ourselves like we would like to be in reality. Living our fantasies is easier online.

Let’s be more sensitive here. There are things in everyone’s life he/she has yet to deal with!

Like the acne marks or job loss, hatred for alcohol or fondness for booze, it’s easy to hide anything and everything online. And obviously we don’t want our online sweetie to know what we perceive to be our own shortcomings or weaknesses.
The extent to which people lie or hide surely differs but it never fades away. Both the parties “nudge the truth” and when the affair goes offline, cracks in the stories become visible.

Also, people try to find a mate in their surroundings first. Internet is usually the last resort and desperation is therefore high.

Since the online profile is the ultimate bait, pages and pages are filled with few facts and plenty of fibs.

Some even seek professional help in filling and judging an online profile. No wonder online spouses commonly accuse each other of lying before marriage to win cases in courts.

Promise anyone anything and get away with it, no consequences online. Given that the major part of the relation evolves through text messages-the tones, mood and verbal cues are absent, increasing the chances of misjudgment. Even if voice chat and web cams become involved, meeting the person online and in reality is still poles apart.

There is one more issue. We see what we want to see. We notice and get attracted to certain characteristics in a person that we consider important. You might get too swept away by what appeals to you and not pay attention to what you, your living standards and circumstances require you to look for in a partner.

Mesmerized by his/her choice of music, discussions on Thackeray, supremacy in chess, and the oh-so pretty photograph that was mailed last week? And of course, the fact that he works out in gym two hours a day and she is unsatisfied with her pedicure this week are viable cues to his/her health and status. These can be misleading.

This information is not enough to decide to spend the rest of your life with him or her.

Plus, the web is a free place for all ages to find love. A 16 year old also wants a relationship too. But is he/she ready for it? Teenagers are not only too young to decide whom to spend their life with, they are also more prone to fall in the wrong hands and get exploited. The love life and its crash landing can have negative affects on their careers and personalities, which have yet to bloom.

For the past few million years attraction has had a different story. Men look for fertile women to spread their seed and women look not only for fertile but also competitive males who will not only impregnate them but also help in bringing up the offspring. Fertility and competitiveness are visible in appearance. The broad jaw line and well built physique in men not only promise healthy genes, but also fine hunting abilities (competitiveness). In modern day, the perfect catch is the one with lot of sex appeal and a high status. Finding the right partner was crucial to our survival and these cues are completely absent online.

Research also suggests that our likeness depends on similar interests, attitudes, beliefs and attractiveness. Opposites might attract (the chances of which are high on the Internet), but in the long run only similitude can assure smooth sailing.
Can we defy, within a decade of the Internet revolution, what we have acquired in millions of years?

In real life, the main factors that get people to hook up include physical proximity. The more you see a person, the more familiar and thus more admirable he/she becomes. If the guy is sitting in Nigeria and the girl in Thailand, dating is a genuine problem. Imagine how frustrating it is to not being able to have enough of your darling.

Physical proximity also has additional benefits. If the lovers share a neighborhood, high school or even a book club, they have access to each others past life, families, friends etc. Above all there are mutual acquaintances. The fractures in the stories mentioned above will have more chances of being leaked out, before it’s too late.

People who meet in real life also end up in bad relationships, but with a higher tendency of online lovers to lie, deceive and misjudge, the chances of break-up are also higher! Another thing that is frustrating is that playing games in the virtual world is easier than in reality. A person can appear visible; become invisible or never sign- in again. It’s very excruciating to have a sweetheart that vanished in thin air for eternity.

Keeping away from online love (if you can help it) will save you a lot of hassle. It’s difficult to talk people out of love, but it’s good to warn them of the impending disaster.